Questions To Ask Your First Date

It seems like dating has become even more difficult with the existence of online dating.  More people are interacting online because there are fewer safe and simple ways to find a partner in the real world.  Online or off, it's easy to become frustrated.

Looking around in various online matchmaking sites is one thing.  But then, once you do find a partner and agree to go out on a date, what's next?  If you're like many peopleand haven't been out on a date for awhile, you may feel uncertain what kind of questions to ask on the first date to get the conversation started and keep it flowing. Hopefully, I can help you resolve a few of these issues.  

So you think your nervious huh?  Many people going on a first date do not realize that their date is probably just as nervous as they are. Keeping this in mind can help a lot. Usually, your conversation will have a natural ebb and flow during a date, but if the silences become a little too long or you find yourself searching desperately for something to say, the first thing to do is RELAX.

Take a deep breath and remember that this is not a test. Everyone feels nervous on a first date, and even if your date doesn’t look nervous, that may just mean he or she is very good at hiding it.

Now that you are relaxed, smile! Meet your date’s eyes and ask, “So, when you’re not working, what do you like to do for fun?” This is a great dating question. You can tell a lot about a person by the things he or she does to relax and unwind. If your date likes to spend hours on the computer, you might presume that he or she is shy in personal situations. If they enjoy teaching their dog new tricks, you can assume they are patient and affectionate. If they absolutely love solving puzzles, you will know they have a very analytical mind and enjoy a good challenge.

Now put the opposit spin on things and mix it up a bit.  Ask: “What sort of things do you not enjoy?” This is important to know, especially if the responsibility for planning the next date falls to you! If your date cannot stand flashing lights and loud sounds, you will know to avoid dance clubs and loud movies. If he or she is allergic to the outdoors, it’s good to know that before you plan that romantic walk along the local nature trail! If they are afraid of water, you wouldn’t want to invite them to go skiing on the lake.

Sometimes, knowing what your date does not enjoy can be more revealing than their answers of what they do enjoy!

After the initial question and answer period is over and your date begins to talk more, the conversation will begin flowing more naturally. Now you can really relax and enjoy yourself!

Remember, a date is a social interaction, not an inquisition, so sit back and listen every now and then, rather than asking a slew of questions one after another. And in the end, when you relax and let the conversation flow, you will likely to get asked out on a second date.

And then you get to do it all over again.